FIRST ONE @ ONE FIRST

Air SCOTUS!

Posted in Non-justiciable, ROCK by Mike Sacks on February 19, 2010

The US Air Guitar Championships has officially announced its 2010 tour dates, and begins with some F1@1F bait:

If history has taught us anything, it is this: the spirit of US Air Guitar is indomitable.

If in January Steve Jobs had unveiled Air Guitar, would it have been any less innovative? If one day the Supreme Court unexpectedly judges a case using the following criteria: technical ability, stage presence, and “airness,” would the rest of us be any worse off? If the last episode of X-Files revealed that Air Guitar was the answer, would you not believe?

F1@1F may disagree with that bold question, but Juris Rocktor does not.  Calling Justice Scalia

ScaliAIR

Posted in ROCK by Mike Sacks on January 6, 2010

Justice Scalia thinks that

hearing modern hard rock with its “noise and ugliness” might constitute cruel and unusual punishment as envisioned in the Constitution.

Juris Rocktor begs to differ.  In fact, I believe Scalia once went so far as to quote Anthrax’sI Am The Law,” when ruling that the death penalty is “totally badass.”

Operation “Get Scalia to Judge this Spring’s DC Regional of the US Air Guitar Championship” is on.

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UPDATE: MetalSucks.net now features an “I AM THE BLAWG” legal advice column brought to you by one Antonin Skullia, Esq.

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